The week went by full of activities and frenzied excitement. We all took time to visit the saloon and we pampered ourselves. You could hardly find any of my friends without their blackberrys, they smiled often and I was glad to see them happy again. Amanda brought clothes, shoes, bags and accessories home for us to choose from. We are paying as my friend doesn’t joke with her money oo!
We sought each other’s advice on what to wear with what and which accessories to go with which outfit. It was as if we were getting ready to meet the president of Nigeria. This was how we spent our days and by Thursday evening, the excitement in the air could burn a hole through the building. I closed early on Thursday and I was sure I would be the first to get home, but I was pleasantly surprised because all my friends were home already.
‘Sup girls? How una dey? You people no go work ni abi na half day you do?’ I said smiling. They all laughed and offered their greetings. I dropped my bag on the table and went into the kitchen. I got the things I needed and covered it with a table towel. I strolled back into the sitting room saying;
‘Gather around me girls, I’m about to tell you one of my sexual secrets, passed down to me from my mother and added to by my humble self.’ All the girls dropped what they were doing and came to sit close to me.
‘So you all have sometimes in the past asked me how I keep all my partners coming back. I want to tell you it’s not all about skills, I get help from these…’ I said unveiling the contents of the bowl.
‘Ginger, shrimps and yogurt.’ I declared.
‘Ginger, shrimps and yogurt?’ They all echoed looking at me suspiciously.
‘Yes my darlings, are you surprised? Don’t be! I’ll explain how these work.’ I told them. They sat upright pushing their faces closer to mine, ready for lecture.
‘Sea foods are aphrodisiac in nature and what aphrodisiac does to your system is that it makes you wanna have sex. It improves your sexual drive and makes you perform better. Oyster is the best aphrodisiac but that’s not easy to find in Naija so we will make do with shrimps. You can use fresh fish, snails, lobsters and prawns if you can find them.’ I enlightened my friends.
‘Wow! How come you are just telling us this? You’re selfish oo! So what’s with the ginger?’ Koyin asked.
‘Well, you all know ginger is good for so many things but the one wey concern us right now is how to use it on your honey pot. What it does to your pussy is that it cleans it, soften it and make it tighter.’ I told them winking.
‘Nawa oo, and you said your mum told you this? Why didn’t mine tell me anything about this?’ Amanda said and we all laughed.
‘What’s the yogurt for? Washing your vagina?’ Bimpe joked.
‘No jor! One week when you guys were not around, all I was eating were yogurt and pastries because I didn’t want to cook. Femi and I had sex that weekend and he said I taste and smell better down below. So I ate yogurt several times before meeting Wale and he said the same thing. That’s how I know yogurt makes you smell and taste better!’ I explained.
‘Mama ooo! I dof for you creativity ooo?’ Amanda said bowing and the rest followed suit.
‘Thank you. Thank you!’ I said smiling.
‘So how do we use the shrimps and ginger?’ Bimpe asked.
‘Well, you peel the ginger,’ I said demonstrating.
‘Make sure you don’t use a big one so you don’t hurt yourself. Just as large as your little finger and half the size of the finger. Then you insert it into your pussy for about four hours but I like to do it over night. When you remove it in the morning, clean up with mild soap and warm water? Sé fini! Please note that this is once in a year treatment oo and don’t have sex for at least three weeks after you do it.’ I explained.
‘Arh! How come you are just telling us tonight when it’s too late?’ Bimpe asked eying me.
‘I’m sorry but no knowledge is lost. Keep it for another day!’ I told them.
‘The shrimps can be cooked anyhow, but I’ve a recipe you will love! If you girls will follow me to the kitchen?’ I led them to the kitchen, put on my apron, and started the preparation.
‘We’ll need butter, olive oil, seasoning, red and green pepper, tomatoes, onions, ginger, garlic, ketchup, red wine, lime or lemon and salt. Those are the basics but you can add vegetables like carrot, broccoli, asparagus, ugwu leaf, scent leaf, etc.’ I said as I put the kettle on the gas.
Bimpe brought out the bag of shrimps from the freezer and started cleaning the shrimps. I told Koyin to chop the peppers, tomatoes, garlics, onions, and ginger. By then the water was hot and I poured it on the peeled shrimps and added three spoonful of lime and a little salt. I put a pot on the stove, turning it to low heat and I scooped three spoonful of butter in it, I allowed it to melt then I added the chopped vegetables, I left it to steam for three minutes while I told Amanda to slice some onions into a plate. I sieved the shrimps of water and I robbed it with olive oil, salt and seasoning and covered it to marinate while the vegetables cook. I checked the vegetables and they were soft enough so I poured the seasoned shrimps into the mixture in the pot. I kept turning it around with a wooden spoon because I didn’t want it to break, over boil or burn. Instead of water, I splashed some red wine and very little lime into it. Lastly, I added the sliced onions. All my cooking didn’t exceed ten minutes. I switched off the fire, scooped some shrimps into a small plate and passed it around for my friends to taste.
‘Hmmmm. Wow! Delicious!’ They all chipped in one at a time.
‘Can we cook the other sea foods like this?’ Koyin asked.
‘Of course. Just make sure they are well cleaned and very well seasoned and leave them to marinate for at least ten minutes before cooking. Be very careful with the lime as too much of it will kill the taste.’ I explained.
‘So, what can we take this with?’ Bimpe asked.
‘Anything you like but not solids oo. Let’s have it with boiled potato and unripe plantain tonight.’ I told them. We all left the kitchen except for Bimpe who was our unofficial cook. Our food was ready in thirty minutes and we ate amid shatters and went to bed.
‘Don’t forget your yogurts girls!’ I reminded them before retiring to my room.
The long-awaited Friday evening came eventually and all of us were doing late minute packing.
‘Do you think this swim-suit is sexy enough?’ Amanda asked Bimpe.
‘Why you dey pack swim-suit, is the guy taking you to the pool?’ Bimpe questioned her back.
‘Mind you business abeg!’ Amanda retorted.
‘How do I look?’
‘How’s my make up?’
‘Do you think I should change into jeans?’
‘I don’t think this hairdo fits me.’ Those were the kind of conversations that had been going on all night. At exactly eight o’clock, our door bell rang and we all went quiet staring at each other.
‘This is it girls, no going back!’ I said and went to open the door but to my surprise, no one was there. Hmmm, they want to play games, I thought but as I was about closing the door I noticed a small basket containing some items on the floor.
‘Girls, come and see this!’ I beckoned to my friends. There were two bottles of Moet champagne and four colorfully wrapped small boxes. We jumped with glee and took the basket indoor. Each wrapped gift has a name on it. Each girl took what belonged to her and opened it. Mine was a gold waist chain and a note that said;
“I’ve never stopped fantasizing about your waist, please wear this for me if it pleases you…”
‘Oh my! It so pleases me!’ I said aloud and took it out of the box and wore it. Bimpe’s box consisted of a wristwatch.
‘Oh gosh, this is adorable!’ Bimpe said while putting on her wristwatch. Koyin’s gift was a broach and it was so fine, she pinned it to her dress. Amanda’s gift was a pair of pearl earrings.
‘Gosh it is beautiful! I’m in love already!’ Amanda gushed.
‘Wow, these boys sure have class!’ Bimpe said admiring her wristwatch.
‘Maybe they had a meeting about us as we had about them but how come they know what we like?’ Koyin said and all eyes turned on me. I laughed.
‘Let’s just say a little bird sang into their ears. Now I’m sure it will be a good weeke…’ a knock on the door interrupted me and this time, Amanda went to answer the door and behold, our princes stood at our doorway.
‘Welcome to the lioness den. Please come in if you are brave enough.’ Amanda said to them.
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…To be continued…
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Written by Olatorera
Edited by Olatorera and Ola Adeyemi Smith.
© 2015 by IBIOLAT communications.